Sea, Sunshine and Sand in Fuerteventura -2 May 2012 to 9 May 2012

A whole week away together in the sunshine and warmth of the Canary Islands, I just couldn’t wait and after all the stress of recent months this break was very timely for us both. Gretchen has often spoken about Fuerteventura and so I was keen to visit the island to see what it was she loved about it. I think that the constant sunshine, golden sandy beaches, clean turquoise seas and great surfing and snorkelling probably have something to do with it.
We had rented an apartment in the Las Dunas Residential complex on the west side of Correlejo. The complex didn’t disappoint. We had a balcony that looked out over a beautiful pool (that was very rarely used as this was mainly residential rather than a holiday complex) and there were no children in the complex either which meant that it was very quiet and peaceful. There was a useful wifi zone in the complex (so that we could still stay in touch with work) and tennis courts and a gym (which we didn’t use).
A real find was a small bay that was a short walk from our complex, that was fantastic for snorkeling. Once in the water the bed of the sea was rocky and home to lots of different fish. We also saw large shoals of fish that came close in to the beach probably to enjoy the warm currents. Lovely.
The highlight of the trip however was a 4 hour buggy ride that we took on our penultimate day, up to the Volcanoes and round to El Cotillo (a surfers beach) and then down the more rugged coastline back towards Correlejo. By the time we got back home we were caked in dust and my hair was solid and matted. But it was worth it! We will definitely be back again in the future.

Friday 13 April to Sunday 15 April 2012 - The Death of My Father

I had just arrived at my office in Bracknell after a morning of client visits when my mobile phone rang with a message from Mum. She had been called by the Doctors in Lavant Ward at St Richard’s Hospital to say that Dad was gravely ill and that she should come into the hospital to be with him. I arranged a taxi straight away to pick her up from home and I jumped in my car and drove straight down to Chichester to be with her. We were told that Dad had asked the doctors to stop his medication and let him die and when asked where he wanted to die he apparently insisted that he die in Hospital and not be moved home. In these circumstances they put a patient on a programme that is called the Liverpool Care Plan and it involves stopping medication, food and water and just giving the patient a level of care and pain relief that is needed to keep them comfortable while they pass away. Dad was already on the LCP by the time we arrived at St Richard’s.
My Dad has been in Hospital for 11 weeks altogether. He was taken in to Bognor Regis War Memorial Hospital on 2 February when he fell at home for the third time in a few days and had to call out the paramedics. They suggested he go into A&E to be checked out. From there he spent 3 weeks in Bognor, the purpose being to rehabilitate him and help him to walk again properly using a walking frame. I was annoyed with the ward there though as they never put Dad’s legs up during the day so the water retention problem that had been causing his legs to swell in the previous months now escalated out of control and his poor body filled up with liquid. I kept asking them to find a stool to put his legs up but it fell on deaf ears and they just kept saying that they couldn’t find a stool!! He ended up being moved into Lavant Ward in Chichester Hospital so that they could try and drain the excess water from his body. Over the next 7 weeks we watched dad get increasingly worse, the size of his limbs did eventually start to subside but he was clearly very ill by this time and I could tell that he was dying. The Doctors never said that however and led us to believe that dad would be coming home. We spent a great deal of time preparing for this event, equipping the house with the necessary aids he would need and arranging for carers to come in 4 times a day to look after him. So it was a big shock on Friday 13 April to get that call to say that he was dying.
I arrived at the Hospital at 14.00 and joined Mum at Dad’s bedside. The curtains had been pulled around him and I asked if he could be moved into a single room but they had nothing available. Dad did stir at one point and the nurses came to administer some morphine to make him more comfortable. Saboohi drove down to be with us late afternoon and I was glad to have her there as she was able to take Mum home in the evening to get some rest. I contacted Bryan and Margaret who were holidaying in Nerja, Spain and they quickly booked a flight home. We were not sure however if they would get to the Hospital before Dad passed away, they couldn’t get a flight until Saturday and we worked it out that they would get to us at the Hospital for about 9 o’clock on Saturday night. We just hoped and prayed that they would make it in time.
I decided to stay with Dad for the night. I couldn’t bear to leave him, what he passed away during the night and we weren’t there? I wanted to be with him, for one of us to be with him. Iwas given a blanket and pillow by the staff who were very kind and kept checking on me through the evening. I was given a bedroom nearby too so that I could get some proper rest during the night and I took advantage of this for a few hours in the early hours of the morning. It was amazingly quiet sitting with Dad through the night. He didn’t stir at all, he was in a comatose state now, and the patients slept quite quietly too.
Saboohi and Mum were back with us by breakfast time and a long day of vigil commenced. Dad ‘s breathing remained smooth and constant throughout the day and he was unchanged, thankfully, by the time Bryan, Margaret, Anna and Ella arrived in the evening. Anna and Ella had insisted on coming to see their Grandad, Laura however had not been told about Dad’s decline as she was away on a Birthday break in Dublin with friends. We were all hoping and praying that Dad would not pass away on Laura’s birthday. Mum and I left the Hospital at about 10 pm and Margaret and Bryan stayed with Dad until the early hours.
On Sunday we started to see a change in Dad’s breathing, it became more laboured and we knew it wouldn’t be long now before we would be saying goodbye to him. The Chaplain came around at 10.30 to read a prayer with us and to bless him. Laura and Ella called in to see him too before leaving for home at about midday. I was alone with Dad for 15 mins while everyone else walked outside to say good bye to the girls. All weekend we have been talking to Dad, kissing him and holding his hand in the hope that he knows we are there. As soon as Margaret, Bryan and Mum came back into the cubicle his breathing became very shallow and I could tell he was leaving us. We all gathered around him, Mum held his hand and I held Mum while Bryan and Margaret stood on the other side of the bed. And Dad....took his final breath. It was so gentle and serene. If there is such a thing as a beautiful death then we had just experienced it. We called the nurse and she took his pulse. His heart was still beating but it was faint. We always knew Dad’s heart would not let him down. He had the heart of an elephant (so his doctor had told him) and we knew that it would be the last thing to let him down. Dad died at 13.00 on Sunday 15 April 2012. We will all miss him terribly.

Birthday Celebrations in Devon - 27 April to 29 April 2012

Gretchen knows how much I love Dartmouth. It is my special and favourite place in the whole of the UK, the place I would like to retire to and have my ashes scattered when the time comes (sorry to be morbid). My time spent at the Naval College in 1985 are some of the happiest memories of my life and the flavour and atmosphere of the place just makes me feel as though I am home whenever I visit. To be different, Gretchen booked us in at a lovely hotel, nestled in a valley around Dittisham called Fingals. A large, relaxed and somewhat eccentric place, we were the only visitors there for the two nights of our stay and had personal access therefore to the swimming pool, sauna, games room and restaurant. The owners’ 2 dogs, Fennel and Leaf roamed around the grounds like friendly security guards, checking us out everytime we wandered through the grounds. At breakfast they would come to our table to see if they could help us clean our plates, same thing at Suppertime and at afternoon tea. We saw them more often than the owners! We stayed in a wooden house in the grounds called The Folly. It was 2 stories with a bedroom downstairs and a door that opened out onto a small landing that hung over the raging river outside. Upstairs it was like a summerhouse with big sofas, TV and an old Vinyl record player plus vinyl records. We enjoyed an obligatory bottle of champagne on arrival. Yum.
On my Birthday I had lots of presents to open. Amongst other things Gretchen gave me a beautiful pair of pearl earrings from Tiffany’s to match my pearl necklace (a birthday present in 2008 from Saboohi). They are really very special.
We spent the morning in my beloved Dartmouth and then crossed the river on the ferry to visit Coleton Fishacre the 1920’s home of the D’Oyly Carte Family and one of the most gorgeous National Trust houses I have visited. I love the architecture and styles of the 1920’s, clean lines, simple but quality designs and textiles, I love it. The gardens are stunning too and stretch down to the cliffs with magnificent views. I couldn’t believe that I had never visited this house before in all the times I have visited Dartmouth. A real find.

Weekend in Bath - Thursday 22 March 2012 - Sunday 25 March 2012

For Gretchen’s 45th Birthday I booked a 3 night break in Bath. We have started a notebook that has a “bucket list” of things we both want to do and a “weekend in Bath” is something that Gretchen had put down as one of her wishes. I booked us into the Cranleigh Hotel (actually a posh B&B) mainly because it had terrific reviews on Trip Adviser and they have beautifully furnished Victorian rooms with big four poster beds. I had arranged for a Birthday Cake and bottle of Champagne to be waiting for us in our room on arrival and they did us proud. It was perfect.
We drove down to Bath in my Porsche Boxster but for the rest of the weekend it sat alone in the car park. Bath is not a place for cars really and it only took us a 20 stroll to get into the heart of the city. The weather all weekend was beautiful with warm, Sunny days. We visited all the usual attractions the Roman Baths, Jane Austen Museum, No 1 Royal Crescent and a trip down the river to Bathampton Mill. On our last day we drove to the National Trust Stately Home Dyrham House, which was used in the Film “The Remains of the Day” starring Emma Thompson and Anthony Hopkins. It is a 17th House that has the most beautiful approach as the house is et in a valley. There used to be a village in the valley with a Church and houses but over the years the House has subsumed all of these buildings. It is unusual as it houses alot of Dutch paintings and collectables as the owner used to be the British Ambassador in Holland.
A lovely weekend treat with lots of happy memories to take away with us.

New Year in Cornwall - 28 Dec 2011 to 3 Jan 2012

After a hectic few days with the family over Christmas it was now time for Gretchen and I to retreat to a beautiful hideaway cottage in the charming village of Croyde,
Cornwall. We both chose Croyde because of the surfing opportunities and we wanted to do some bodyboarding in the icy winter sea. This bay is a surfing paradise
and is busy with surfers all year round. Thankfully we were able to hire full winter wetsuits from one of the local shops (otherwise we wouldn’t have been able to enter the sea let alone stay in for any reasonable amount of time.

We went bodyboarding twice on 30 December and again on 2 January. It was very cold and our suits were still damp from the previous user but once we were in the sea we did start to warm up and the surfing was very exciting. I have really taken to this sport and as there was a sale on at the Hire shop I decided to invest in a new Spring/Summer wetsuit. Hope I don’t have to wait too long to wear it!

The weather was quite damp and grey during most of the week so we spent a great deal of time huddled up in our lovely cottage watching DVDs and drinking and eating to
excess (again!). We watched the ROME box set and The L Word Box Set. We did have a few trips out. One day we visited Dartington Glass in Great Torrington and I bought a beautiful pair of liqueur glasses for Gretchen as a reminder of the trip. But nainly we stayed in and just enjoyed each other’s company, relaxed in the Jacuzzi bath upstairs and watched our DVDs. Perfect.

Christmas Day 2011

It was a real family Christmas this year as I drove Mum and Dad up to Bryan and Margaret’s on Christmas Eve. As all the girls were at home and as Dad is unable to scale the stairs now, Bryan had booked Mum and Dad into the Holiday Inn which was just 5 mins down the road, at the Airport. It was quite a walk from the car to the bedroom (on the ground floor but Dad was great and managed the walk, mainly without stopping. He has been suffering with water retention in his legs recently which has curtailed his mobility and on the first night in the Hotel he had a water blister on one of his legs that burst. Once open it constantly weeps but poor thing, he endured it in silence for the whole break.

Christmas Day was the usual mix of eating to excess, present opening to excess and game playing to excess. The main games this year were a homemade version of Deal or No Deal complete with 26 red boxes and a published board game version of Million Pound Drop. All expertly hosted by Bryan of course!